Facebook Comments To Count As 50% of Final Political Science Grade

Students enrolled in PS-2504: Politics of the Middle East and PS-1004 Introduction to US Politics walked out of class in shock today as a last-second twist in the grading system was revealed: all final grades would be heavily determined by their actions on Facebook. It is a change that has sent many humanities students into a panic.

An announcement by Dr. Michael Cairo clarified that the accuracy, logic, and rhetoric of the countless arguments that his students had engaged in via Facebook political posts and comment thread debates over the past months would count as a whopping 50% of each student’s final grade. He explained the political science departments actions with:

“These college kids are glued to Facebook all day fighting a war of intellectual dominance on current events and social issues, and it’s about time they get some credit for all of the hard work and valid points. Whether it’s their old high school friends post about 2nd Amendment rights or cousin’s shared article about Islamic extremists, these 20-somethings are on the scene fighting tooth-and-nail to prove that they’re right and more importantly, everyone else is wrong. It’s wild.”

Professors in the political science department seem to agree that a number of their students are silent in class, but raising hell online; a place where they felt more free to be negative or offensive because they weren’t getting graded– until now. 

Dr. Don Dugi quipped “I can’t say what’s worse: these heated Facebook arguments on Planned Parenthood, or this last batch of papers on US Politics.”

– Burris Jenkins




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