Students Riot as Softball Team Wins Double Header

LEXINGTON, KY – The Department of Public Safety was forced to declare the Bourbon Street area a state of emergency saturday evening as students took to the street to celebrate the victory of the Softball team over conference rival Bluffton. The Pioneers took home two wins against the Beavers in a double header. In Lexington, Transy students celebrated in big fashion.


“I was so overcome with emotion,” One student recalls of the night, “I just had to go outside and scream and yell and flip things over. I’ve believed in this team from the very start, and knew they could pull it off. Go Pios!”

It was not all fun and games on Bourbon Street however, as DPS was called to extinguish fires started by students. The ashes of at least 2 pillows and an ottoman could be found in the road on Sunday morning.

“I’ve never seen anything like it,” The DPS Chief said, “It just seems so ridiculous to riot over sporting events. I guess nothing gets sports fans excited like womens’ softball.”

-Horace Holley


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