It’s that time of year again, Transy class registration. Right in the middle of stressing out about your current classes, nothing calms your nerves like adding 4 more courses on top your nice little stress-mountain. Chances are that you wound up dead last in the scheduling slot for your class, so to be honest, you’re better off removing yourself from your 17 wait lists, going out in Back Circle, and laying in the volleyball court sand for a few hours.
It’s not if something goes wrong, it’s when something goes wrong during your 1:25pm time slot on the 31st as you scramble to click through Tnet as class starts. We pretty much guarantee that each of things will happen to you:
2) NBC’s Brian Williams will walk into Jazzman’s with a crowbar and smash your Macbook to pieces
3) That class you need in order to graduate will instantly be filled beyond capacity by the cast of Full House
4) A peregrin falcon will swoop from the sky and shit all over your course pass
5) You’ll suddenly wake up in a corn field in Nebraska wearing a bolo tie, a Celine Dion t-shirt, and camo crocs.
6) TUWIFI won’t work.
– Burris Jenkins