LEXINGTON, KY – In a recent development, the Shambler is receiving reports that an unfortunate work study student was forced to actually perform duties related to his work study assignment today. Lucas Steiner, a faculty assistant to an anonymous history professor, claims he was coerced into copying and stapling a reading assignment this afternoon.
“It was total bullsh-t,” Steiner said, “Usually, I come in and sit there. I’ll work on homework for a couple of minutes. I’ll watch a couple episodes of How I Met Your Mother, and I’ll leave. It’s a great arrangement. But today he had the audacity to actually make me copy his stupid little papers and staple them. I’m demanding a transfer to the campus center or library or something. What do they ever do?”
Steiner says he contacted lawyers with the possibility of pressing charges. The history department declined to comment.